I realize that I am occupied by negative thoughts and lose my confidence whenever I am upset and/or tired and feel lonely. Here are such thoughts I went through a moment ago tonight:
I think... that I have developed a nasty habit that I like to put down other people, including myself. I tend to tell them their, and tell myself my, weaknesses and shortcomings. I tend to think negatively towards others as well as myself. I do not have a habit of praising others.
This is largely due to the education method I have experienced from my mother and most of my school teachers. The traditional chinese education mainly points out your weaknesses to stimulate you, intead of encouraging you by praising your merit. Because your own teacher and your own mother do this to you everyday, you form the habit of doing the same thing!
Results: lack of self-confidence, lack of self-esteem; always self-critic. Because of this, I like to think about other people's weaknesses in order to make myself feel better, I thus do not have a habit of praising others. This forms a vicious circle.
...
The good news is: by writing down these negative thoughts, I feel better and I feel my confidence revives.
Have a strong mind; you can control your mind.
Posted by Bozeman at February 26, 2004 11:02 PMI am proud of you since you can write down this but I do not have enough courage to show it up. Deem you are going to overcome and overtake yourself.
The christ always prayed for his enemies, especially the men who crucified him and taught his students to love and pray for them. As the person, it's difficult to persuade self doing in this way. The reason is that there is none of people who is perfect except the God. Last time, I said we need a happy life and you answered me one word-'actively'. Exactly right!
One month ago, a friend told me there is only one word of Love in the bible. To love every one around us, how beautiful the world is! Further, as you said, if people praise and forgive any one including themselves, the world will become the paradise without hatred and sin. Love is most important in the world.
Hope you to watch the movie of the Passion of Christ which states a true story.
Posted by: Jerry at February 27, 2004 06:03 AM我看 Fromm 的书时，头一次理解了“博爱”的思想。
小时候接受的教育，中毒太深，“博爱”似乎总是个贬义词。现在我在慢慢地理解并喜欢它。
Posted by: bozeman at March 2, 2004 12:46 PM去年送给一个法国朋友一副字“博爱”，他喜欢得不得了，花了大价钱装裱以后挂在自己的房间内，心里那个美呀。我恭维他做到了博爱着一点，他反过来说我才是，我LP在旁边说“你们两个就相互吹捧吧”，事实上我是离这个境界相去甚远，而他是做到了。
有一次我们GROUP开讨论会研究公司成长的GROWTH BARRIER，我引用中国的危机一词，说明中国的思想中认为“危机=危险+机遇”，我导师听了之后击掌称赞，让我用POWERPOINT给他把这两个字写出来；而这次我在国内找到一个很好的书法家替他写了的“危机”的二字，我挂在自己的房间，真的觉得满屋子都有了一点点书卷气，可惜你这里无法贴上来。
Posted by: zhaoxy at March 2, 2004 03:36 PM