It's been two hectic weeks for me--my parents were visiting me, wife just came back from China and will start working in a different city. Now that my parents left and the wife has settled into the new apartment, I'm ready to go back to my normal life (with a new, two hours commute each way once every week). I don't know what it's going to be like. But we will have a little more money now, and as economists would say, we should be strictly happier because our choice set has strictly increased. I hope we will not prove economists wrong.
I'm still in this bigger city, and will drive back to the city where I work tomorrow morning. From the hustle and bustle of big city to the quiet neighborhood of a small town. From the glitzy high-rise apartment we just moved into to the now-familiar house we've been living for two years. From the world of two to the world of myself. I feel I'm fortunate to be able to switch between the two extreme worlds. I don't know which one I will feel more attached to.
Oh well, we will see.
Posted by Shamu at September 5, 2004 10:44 PMEverbody likes what they like, personally, I have been thinking of moving to Weihai (威海市). I have never been there, but it seems just the right size, right climate, just need to see if the people are right.
JFS
Posted by: JFS at September 6, 2004 08:06 AMI heard Weihai is a very nice city. I'm positive you'll like it there. Lucky you, I've never lived in a city by the sea.
Posted by: shamu at September 6, 2004 12:22 PMFor the last 2 years Wendy and her husband works in the different country. Every year they meet 4 times. He comes to see her once, she goes to see him once, and they travel together twice. Love and career, they get both. It's great.Isn't it.: )
Posted by: Wendy at September 7, 2004 08:04 AMI'd like to know what westerners, especially Americans think about this. It seems this happens more within Chinese couples. Maybe because they have to work both careers to survive as the first-generation immigrants?
Posted by: shamu at September 7, 2004 08:34 AMYes, you’re partly right.
They are overseas Chinese, and grew up in Western country.
Actually both of them have great professional background, and work in very famous companies. They are Yuppie. : )
I think that I should change my name now. : )
Posted by: Wendy at September 7, 2004 08:59 AMNo. You don't have to change your name if you just point out it's another Wendy.
I have a few Chinese colleagues here that either live in a different city, or live away from their spouses. So when a close colleague (herself Spanish) got to know my wife's situation, she went "what's with you Chinese people"? (BTW, this would never come out of the mouth of an American--to them, it would be discrimination. But it's ok with Europeans, at least from their, and my, perspective.) Well, I guess we are more willing to make family sacrifices for our career. We are just brought up so--our moms and dads work in their whole life, and we have to as immigrants. Is it good or bad? I don't know. It all depends on how you (and your family) value careers and family life, and the relationship of the two.
As I already talked so much about her, it's a little uncomfortable for me to use this name any more. I am not either Wendy.
From now I am Cindy. : )
Most Americans would never live that way. I talked about this on my blog a while back. I think most Americans would think the most important thing is to live with your spouse/family. When I first heard about Chinese living this way, I was amazed. It shocked me. This is ironic, I think, because it contradicts both Chinese and American stereotypes of each other. (Chinese tend to think Americans aren't family-centered because of cultural differences). Most Americans would ask Chinese who live this way, "Don't you care about being with your family?" Just like most Chinese would ask Americans the same question because American children are brought up to be more independent than Chinese children. These are just cultural ironies.
My manger also works in China by himself. His wife has her work at home. Actually there are quite a few people work like this in my company. People may have a long time strategy for their life, not only their family life, but their career and social life. We wouldn't be really happy, if we weren't satisfied with 3 of them, Psychologist said.
Posted by: Cindy at September 9, 2004 08:01 PMCindy:
Is your manager Chinese or a westerner?
Westerner.
Posted by: Cindy at September 10, 2004 12:26 AM